Friday, July 17, 2009

Learning To Love Yourself (More) pt. 9


(Mr. Wang's Cars, Untitled Landscapes, 2009)

Something Has Changed

It's that feeling of recovery, and aftershock leaving you as it evaporates into whatever matter it once was. You don't care, it is gone, you're different, you are change. The feelings you once had look ridiculous like concepts you developed as a child, and you laugh at how silly the drama once was.
The things you value so much may not matter, because you are the only one that values them as they oppose you, resist your love for them. How swift it can all change, how you can live passed it all, how you can even forget in time. All that matters is you are different, you have changed.
And deep down inside, something has changed. The once you is now you, and the once her or him is now just her or just him. No longer is there someone holding you from high above, feeding you hope, carry you by your back against the ground, throwing crumbs to keep you alive, you have pulled your shirt clear, perhaps even ripped it from your back, the air fills the naked gap and your hairs point up to an attention that your body is now independent. Your flesh no longer registered to the hand at one singular point. It feels free; relieved of burden we place on ourselves, as we ask, why all the games. You no longer have anyone to blame, nor can you blame yourself, as matter turns into air, and what has happened, happened.
Your structure is high above as you walk with feet your forgot were your own. No more questions to the unknown for they will never answer. Walk the earth, and live. Something has changed. It really has.

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